Operation Sgrub Guide

by **Drouth** Wed Feb 16, 2011 10:25 pm

-- hibernalHawkshaw [HH] posted a memo in Sburbvivors --
-- Memo subject changed to "Operation Sgrub Guide" --

HH: It has come to my attention that perrhaps ourr efforrts in guiding ourr, forr lack of an apprroprriate alterrnative, prrogenies has turrned out to be somewhat less successful and prreviously anticipated.
HH: Those that rremain on speaking terrms arre likely to crrack underr the strrain
HH: If not outrright goaded by those rrefusing to answerr ourr messages.
HH: If anything, they seem to be morre successful in playing with ourr minds than we who can quite literrally view theirr entirre lives.
HH: And unforrtunately, I do not feel myself capable at prresent of prroposing a suitable courrse of corrrrective action.

-- spectralPsiren [SP] began responding to the memo --

SP: We have come to an im-passe, I be-lieve.
HH: That is the underrstatement of the sweep.
SP: Our op-tions have be-come locked be-tween risk-ing a par-a-dox by shar-ing in-for-ma-tion and dar-ing the pos-si-bil-i-ty that it will change and thus pro-duce a doomed time-line
HH: The trricky thing is, though
SP: or with-hold-ing this vi-tal in-for-ma-tion to the frus-tra-tion and ag-gres-sion of our a-li-en con-tacts.
HH: Ly, have you been able to actually see the end of theirr game?
SP: I have not.
SP: Trol-li-an's time-line fun-ctions on-ly pro-gress so far.
SP: There is a sud-den cut-off with-out ex-plan-a-tion.
HH: Arre you cerrtain?
SP: Un-less the er-ror is cli-ent-side.
HH: Because mine demonstrrates that theirr timelines arre still going at the point wherre the viewporrt cuts out.

-- loquaciousAmateur [LA] began responding to the memo --

LA: OH|BOY|WHAT|ARE|YOU|PLANNING|NOW|
HH: Actually, I am morre than open to ideas.
SP: That is what I meant, yes. There is lit-tle point in con-sid-er-ing the time-line points bey-ond that zone with-out the view-port, at least at this stage.
SP: Sim-ply put, Guil-la.
SP: We are out of op-tions.
HH: Not entirrely.
SP: You said you have a plan.
HH: I have a plan that I am about to put into action.
LA: OH|JOY|OF|JOYS|SIGRUN|HAS|A|PLAN|
HH: RRapid and severre intoxication.
SP: At this point, I think it be-comes nec-es-sar-y for us to share our plans ra-ther than at-tempt se-par-ate al-ter-na-tives while ...
LA: AHA|
LA: AHAHAHAHAHA|
SP: o_o
LA: AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA|
HH: I am tapped out.
SP: Please as-sure me that is a jest, Sig-run.
HH: Between babysitting in the lab and trrying to prrevent these humans frrom getting themselves killed
HH: I lack the enerrgy forr this horrseshit.
SP: Let me be straight-for-ward then. Do you think the si-tu-a-tion is, com-plete-ly, bey-ond a-ny chance of re-con-cil-i-a-tion?
LA: I|AM|SAVORING|THIS|MOMENT|
SP: I am sure.
HH: I honestly cannot forrce myself to carre, Guilla.
SP: What of you then Guil-la? How has your plan pro-gressed? The one of which you have yet to share a-ny in-for-ma-tion?
LA: SOMEWHAT|
SP: And do you have a-ny-thing to re-port?
LA: NO|
HH: Why am I not surrprrised?
SP: Are you say-ing so be-cause you tru-ly have no-thing, or be-cause you still do not wish to share what in-for-ma-tion you have ac-qui-red?
LA: MY|PLAN|HAS|NOT|PROGRESSED|FAR|ENOUGH|YET|TO|WARRANT|SHARING|
LA: BUT|EVEN|IF|IT|HAD|I|PROBABLY|WOULD|NOT|FEEL|COMPELLED|TO|TELL|
SP: E-ven de-spite the Axe of Sel-com-ad that rests a-bove all our horns as we speak?
LA: IT|IS|YOUR|OWN|FAULT|NOW|IS|IT|NOT|
SP: I am quite a-ware of that.
SP: As it has been poin-ted out se-ver-al times.
LA: AND|YET|YOU|STILL|ASK|
HH: I just want to rreasserrt that had we followed my advice and not set the Derrsian monarrchs against each otherr...
LA: HEY|THAT|WAS|MY|IDEA|
LA: OR|RATHER|
LA: I|WAS|THE|ONE|WHO|DID|NOT|WANT|TO|DO|THAT|
SP: Re-gard-less
SP: We are here. Dis-taste for this pre-dic-a-ment is ob-vi-ous but it is our lot for now.
SP: And I for one am not rea-dy to curl in-to a dry co-coon and wait to die.
SP: We have strug-gled blind-ly for long e-nough, I think. And look what it has pro-duced for us.
SP: Our si-tu-a-tion re-mains and our one chance for es-cape is quick-ly turn-ing its back on us.
LA: OH|NO|
LA: THEY|HAVE|TURNED|THEIR|BACKS|ON|YOU|TWO|
LA: WHAT|A|SURPRISE|

-- taciturnMercenary [TM] began responding to the memo --

TM: I5 thi5 even workin8?
LA: OF|COURSE|IT|IS|WORKING|
LA: UNLESS|YOU|MEAN|SIGRUNS|PLAN|
HH: Guilla, if you engineerred my rremoval frrom the widget, I will find a way to make yourr life miserrable.
LA: THEN|NO|
SP: Our net-work is faul-ty. I need to fix that.
SP: And good, Gle-nys is here, per-haps we will be a-ble to get some-where with this dis-cus-sion.
HH: Oh good.
HH: We need anotherr sane mind.
SP: Look. Guil-la. I am all for se-cre-cy when war-ran-ted.
SP: But there is no pro-fit to this at this point. If you have an i-de-a that has a chance of suc-ceed-ing, bet-ter to put as ma-ny as pos-si-ble to put ef-fort in-to it at this rate.
SP: It seems a waste of time to con-tin-ue on a failed course when a-no-ther op-tion is pre-sent.
SP: And the on-ly o-ther al-ter-na-tive I can sur-mise is full dis-clo-sure. Which has its own com-pli-ca-tions and pro-blems.
LA: YOUR|POINT|
SP: We have, as far as I can see, two op-tions.
SP: One. You share the de-tails of your plan and we pur-sue. Since the pri-or at-tempts failed, a-no-ther route is nec-ces-sar-y.
SP: Two. Full dis-clo-sure to the hu-mans. I will do so my-self if ne-ces-sar-y.
SP: If there is a third op-tion that is not sit and wait, I am o-pen to sug-ges-tions.
HH: I gave my suggestion.
SP: I can do ma-ny things in-tox-i-ca-ted Sig-run but give in-struc-tions to a-li-ens is not one of them.
HH: And giving them instrructions while soberr has worrked well.
HH: Ly, didn't you disclose everrything to one of them?
SP: Not e-ver-y-thing.
SP: I have not shared the rea-son for our in-ter-ests, nor a few o-ther de-tails of their ses-sion.
LA: I|MAY|SHARE|MY|PLAN|LATER|
LA: IF|AMMENDS|ARE|MADE|
SP: Fine.
LA: AND|I|WOULD|NOT|HIDE|IT|FROM|
LA: FORAII|
LA: MAYBE|GLENYS|
LA: BUT|YOU|AND|SIGRUN|CAN|SUCK|MY|BONE|BULGE|
TM: Guilla.
LA: WHAT|
TM: I do not 5ee why you would hide 5omethin8 like thi5 from part5 of our 8roup.
LA: YOU|NEVER|ASKED|
LA: AND|THEY|ARE|IDIOTS|
SP: I will ad-mit some of my choi-ces have not been the most...
SP: Wise.
TM: If it i5 5omethin8 that i5 in the be5t intere5t of our 8roup than it 5hould be 5hared.
LA: LIKE|I|SAID|
SP: What do you want then?
LA: NOT|HIDING|IT|FROM|YOU|OR|FORAII|
SP: Let us get this out of the way so pro-duc-tive ac-tion can be ta-ken. What sort of am-ends do you want?
LA: FROM|YOU|
SP: Yes
LA: LET|ME|THINK|
LA: YOU|CAN|JUST|REMOVE|THE|VIRUS|AND|APOLOGIZE|I|GUESS|
SP: Ve-ry well. You have my a-pol-o-gy and the vi-rus will be re-moved.
TM: Guilla, do you realize that the viru5 i5 there becau5e you did not appear a5 the mo5t rational at the time?
LA: HUH|
LA: LEARNED|YOUR|LESSON|THEN|
LA: MAYBE|YOU|ALL|WERE|THE|IRRATIONAL|ONES|
SP: At this point
SP: I no longer care of ra-tion-al-i-ty.
SP: I am too fo-cused on pre-ven-ting us all from dy-ing.
TM: Well perhap5 you are 5till not rational enou8h to reco8nize it, Guilla.
TM: I would al5o like to apolo8ize for not bein8 more re5pon5ive to thi5 conver5ation.
LA: RATIONAL|ENOUGH|TO|RECOGIZE|WHAT|
TM: I have been... di5tacted. I am 5orry aboubt this; I do not mean to ne8lect my re5pon5ibilitie5 toward u5.
TM: To reco8nize that you are bein8 irrational.
LA: AND|HOW|AM|I|BEING|IRRATIONAL|
LA: NOT|WANTING|TO|LET|SIGRUN|WALK|IN|AND|RUIN|MY|PLAN|LIKE|SHE|RUIND|HER|OWN|
TM: You are not tellin85 u5 your plan5 5o we have no idea what you are even doin8 or if it i5 in the best intere5t for u5.
LA: WELL|I|WOULD|
LA: BUT|LIKE|I|SAID|
LA: NOT|SHARING|IT|WITH|SIGRUN|
HH: You want me to leave?
LA: YOU|WOULD|JUST|READ|THE|MEMO|
LA: I|AM|NOT|AN|IDIOT|
HH: Seeing as therre is absolutely no getting thrrough to you and nothing I say will make any degrree of differrence...
HH: Yes, Guilla. You arre an idiot. We have all known this, and everry time you open yourr mouth you rremind us anew. Everry action you have taken thrroughout this game has been counterrprroductive to ourr ultimate surrvival. This in mind, you fail to see why we wish to exclude you frrom ourr plans.
HH: I often wonderr what injurry yourr lusus sufferred to rraise you in such a way. Therre is no way any trroll should be as petulant and entitled as you have somehow grrown to become.
HH: And had I not made it a perrsonal marrk of honorr to stay my hand frrom my teammates, you would be the firrst to go.
HH: You desirre me out of the memo? Verry well. I'm off to put my plan into action.

-- hibernalHawkshaw [HH] ceased responding to the memo --

TM: 5aying thin85 like that will only make thin8s wor5e, Sigrun.
TM: Why i5 it that we cannot stay a cohe5ive 8roiup.
SP: I blame the dur-ess of our cur-rent si-tu-a-tion.
LA: OUR|SURVIVAL|
LA: OUR|PLANS|
LA: THEN|WHY|WAS|I|CUT|OFF|FROM|CONTRIBUTING|
LA: YOU|THINK|I|WANT|TO|DIE|
LA: OF|COURSE|NOT|
TM: I wa5 not resp;on5ible for that.
LA: YOU|ALL|SEEM|TO|THINK|I|CAN|NOT|SEE|OUR|SITUATION|
LA: THAT|I|WILL|JUST|GO|AROUND|MAKING|THE|HUMANS|HATE|US|
LA: NO|
LA: I|MIGHT|MAKE|THEM|HATE|ME|
LA: BUT|ANYTHING|THEY|FEEL|TOWARDS|YOU|IS|YOUR|OWN|FAULT|
LA: IF|ANYTHING|THEM|HATING|ME|WOULD|HAE|BEEN|A|BOON|TO|YOU|
SP: In what man-ner?
LA: MAKE|YOURSELF|SEEM|A|WHOLE|LOT|BETTER|
LA: MORE|HELPFULL|THEN|THAT|GREENBLOOD|JERK|
LA: BUT|NO|
SP: The mis-take, I be-lieve, was as-sum-ing they would im-med-i-ate-ly see us as a sing-u-lar group.
TM: Guilla youre 5o overwhelmjin8ly ne8ative.
LA: I|WAS|CUT|OUT|OF|OUR|OR|SHOULD|I|SAY|SIGRUNS|PLAN|
SP: Which I will ad-mit was not my best judge-ment.
LA: AND|LOOK|HOW|THAT|ENDED|
LA: AND|LOOK|
LA: NOW|YOU|ALL|WANT|IN|ON|MY|PLAN|
TM: Ye5 5o why do you think cugttin8 hre out of your plan5 will do any better.
LA: AND|I|AM|BEING|IRRATIONAL|FOR|BEING|ANGRY|
LA: FUCK|YOU|
SP: Gle-nys, what is wrong with your text?
TM: What do you mean there i5 nothing wronnn8.
SP: Are you drink-ing?
SP: ...
TM: I am con5min8 fluid5 if that5 whta you mean/
LA: ANOTHER|SUCCESS|FOR|SIGRUNS|PLANS|
LA: A|TRUE|INSPIRATION|TO|US|ALL|
SP: Guil-la... yes... and that was a mis-take. Yet a-no-ther for me. I trust you are keep-ing re-cord.
TM: Hey, Guilla.
TM: Hey
LA: WHAT|
TM: Thi5 ha5 nothin8 to do witih Sugrun'5 plan5 okay?
LA: WHAT|DO|YOU|WANT|GLENYS|
TM: I am my own individual capable of making my own choice5 ehen I 5we fit/
LA: AND|YOU|MADE|A|BAD|DECISION|BASED|ON|A|SUGGESTION|FROM|SIGRUN|
LA: BUT|YOU|KNOW|WHAT|
LA: MAYBE|I|WILL|JOIN|YOU|
SP: What
TM: Well therer i5 plenty here.
LA: JUST|FORGET|ABOUT|MY|PLAN|TO|SAVE|US|AND|DRINK|THE|HOURS|AWAY|
LA: SINCE|THAT|IS|SIGRUNS|PLAN|AND|YOU|ALL|SEEM|TO|LOVE|THOSE|
SP: I do not think this is a prof-it-a-ble plan.
LA: BUT|IT|IS|FROM|SIGRUN|
LA: HOW|CAN|IT|FAIL|
SP: You have made your point.
TM: After all i have done it i5 only fair that I finally 8et to relax.
SP: What did you do, if I may in-qui-re?
TM: What do you evgen mean ni Sgrub of cour5e.
SP: Ah
SP: I do not think this me-mo is of a-ny fur-ther use.
TM: No noi wait\
TM: Guilla
TM: I have pleeenty left.
TM: Come no and we can ju5t caln down.
LA: NO|
LA: FUCK|OFF|I|AM|NOT|DRINKING|ANY|OF|THAT|DISGUSTING|STUFF|
SP: I am with Guil-la on this.
LA: THAT|IS|STUPID|AND|SIGRUN|IS|STUPID|FOR|SUGGESTING|IT|
LA: AND|YOU|SURPRISINGLY|ARE|EVEN|STUPIDER|
LA: BECAUSE|YOU|LISTENED|TO|HER|
TM: What if I ewanted to do thi5 entitely independant of her.
LA: YOU|DID|NOT|WANT|TO|UNTIL|SHE|SUGGESTED|IT|
LA: YOU|WOULD|NOT|HAVE|EVEN|THOUGHT|OF|IT|
TM: It i5 mky reward to nmy5elf for dealkign with everyonr untikl noe.
LA: IT|IS|THE|EXACT|OPPOSITE|OF|A|REWARD|
LA: YOU|WANT|A|REWARD|
LA: I|WILL|GIVE|YOU|A|REWARD|
LA: JUST|STOP|DRINKING|THATA|STUFF|
TM: Fuckj yhou thi5 i5 the ela5t worrieed and mo5t reladxed I have been in week5.
LA: WE|HAVE|NOT|EVEN|BEEN|PLAYING|FOR|WEEKS|

-- sereneFlorist [SF] began responding to the memo --

TM: Hello Foraii it i5 nicer to 5ee hyolu on.
LA: FORAII|
LA: HELP|
LA: SIGRUN|AND|GLENYS|ARE|INTOXICATED|
SP: For-aii please please tell me you are so-ber. Not that I doubt it but to-day has been one of those days.
SF: Wow ookay, II waz oot for a whiile. What happened?
TM: You are all 5auyin thir5 like it i5 s bad thin8.
LA: IT|IS|
LA: I|JUST|SAID|IT|IS|
SP: A short sum-ar-ry
SP: Sig-run's plan to con-tact the hu-mans has failed ter-rib-ly.
SP: She and Gle-nys are now quite in-tox-i-ca-ted.
TM: Like I 5aid I feel betterf than i haver in week5 5o perjmit me my 5nmalll plkea5ures.
SP: As you can see.
SF: K, II am kiind of offended here
SF: Yoo guyz diidn't wake me oop for thiiz
SF: Thiiz iiz what II've been zayiing we zhoold have done from the ztart
SP: What?
LA: OH|GOD|
SF: Pazz me zome of that ztuff, Glenyz
LA: NO|FORAII|WE|ARE|NOT|GETTING|DRUNK|
LA: NO|
LA: NO|
LA: NO|
LA: NO|
LA: NO|
LA: NO|
LA: NO|
LA: NO|
LA: NO|
LA: I|COMMAND|YOU|TO|NOT|DRINK|
SP: Si-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-igh
SP: It ap-pears we are on our own Guil-la.
SF: Zhiit, calm down. IIt waz a joke
SF: Yoo are alwayz zo hiigh-stroong
TM: YHe5 that was exactly what I had beenb ju5t thionkin8 Foraii.
LA: LISTEN|
LA: I|AM|GOING|TO|BE|SO|HELPFUL|RIGHT|NOW|YOU|WILL|NOT|EVEN|BELIEVE|
TM: He dud not wnat to wwind down and reladx wiuth me, wehrer we coulo enjooyo each other5 conmpany or noe.

-- loquaciousAmateur [LA] takes the sopor away from taciturnMercenary [TM] --

-- loquaciousAmateur [LA] takes the sopor away from hibernalHawkshaw [HH] --

-- loquaciousAmateur [LA] captchalogues the sopor --

LA: THERE|
SF: Hey can II have a liittle biit at leazt?
TM: What noi what did yiu do that for Guilla I wa5 ernoying my5elf what i5 wron8 with uoi/.
LA: MAYBE|LATER|
LA: GLENYS|
LA: SHUT|UP|
TM: HEYH FUCKJ HYOU GUILLA I DE5ERVDSFMY BRESKL
SP: o_o
LA: AT|THIS|POINT|YOU|DO|NOT|DESERVE|ANYTHNG|OTHER|THAN|YOUR|HORNS|KNOCKED|OFF|YOUR|HEAD|
LA: NOW|SOBER|UP|
TM: FUCDK JOFF GIVDF MNRE THA BAK
LA: NO|
SF: Guyz yoo zhoold probably calm down here
SF: Help me wiith thiiz Lyagara
TM: YIou aa55 if youw had to deal the blul5hitI di
SP: I am not sure what there is I can do.
LA: WE|NEED|TO|DRAG|THEM|BACK|TO|THEIR|RECUPRACOONS|
LA: AND|MAKE|SURE|THEY|SLEEP|RATHER|THAN|EAT|MORE|OF|THE|SOPOR|

-- loquaciousAmateur [LA] leaves his computer --

TM: WHAT ARE YOU FOING GUILLA

-- loquaciousAmateur [LA] hoists taciturnMercenary [TM] over his shoulder --

SP: o_o
LA: Mind|the|horns.|
SP: I sup-pose I should take Sig-run then.

-- taciturnMercenary [TM] drunkenly aims blows at loquaciousAmateur's [LA]'s head --

-- loquaciousAmateur [LA] carries taciturnMercenary [TM] off towards the transportalizer --

LA: God|damn|it!|
SF: All riight, II'll
SF: Go take another nap
LA: Calm|down|dammit!|
SP: Sor-ry a-bout this For-aii.

-- taciturnMercenary [TM] continues to fail horribly at making any sort of damaging contact --

SP: Per-haps you could talk to the hu-mans or some-thing, where the rest of us have failed mis-er-a-bly. Well ex-cept Guil-la ap-par-ent-ly.
SF: Nah, iit'z cool

-- loquaciousAmateur [LA] transportalizes with taciturnMercenary [TM] in tow --

SF: Okay, guezz II coold try
SP: Ap-pre-ci-a-ted.

-- taciturnMercenary [TM] ceased responding to the memo --
-- loquaciousAmateur [LA] ceased responding to the memo --
-- spectralPsiren [SP] ceased responding to the memo --
-- sereneFlorist [SF] ceased responding to the memo --

-- Memo closes --